day one hundred: parting ways

wow. i cant believe its been one hundred days. looking back, i am amazed at all the time that has past. when i started, it seemed like four months was so long, like i would never reach the end of it. now that end is almost come, and im wondering what happened to all the days in between.

im back in kenya now. i arrived yesterday after traveling through the night. i didnt get much sleep, but its to be expected. i think i always have to be tired when i first get to kenya : ) its good being back. i am staying at the same house as before, but much has changed. theres only one other person here now, mary, as opposed to the multitude of family and life that busted forth from it at my last visit. its nice though, the smallness of it. itll be a lot of meetings one on one with people. im looking forward to that, to deepening the relationships ive started.

i didnt realize last time how huge nairobe is. i was just wandering around for an hour, trying to find the spot where we used to use internet. i dont know how, except that God helped me, but im here now. makes me miss tyler and irene. i hope theyre having fun in the cold!

ill be traveling to mumbassa, the coast, in a day or two. looking forward to some time to rest and reflect on all ive seen and experienced. sometimes, things happen so fast or so relentlessly, that i dont have time to pause and see how its effecting me. that self reflection, and being intentional in taking time to do it, has been so influential for me. im learning a lot about myself, about God, and about this world. not to mention that its been forever since ive been on a surf board : )

already i miss kampala. it was with a heavy heart that i said goodbye to friends and family- the people who made my time there so memorable. it was especially sad that i didnt get to say goodbye to my street kid friends. there has been a lot of football lately, and that usually equals empty streets. we went a couple of times my last few days, but no luck.

in regards to steven and dennis, im afraid thats a disappointing ending as well. i met a girl named sarah. she lives in jinja, and runs a kids home specifically for street kids. i figured that couldnt just be coincidence, so we went to pay her a visit. her home is great. there are fifteen former street kids in her care. they are all well fed, in school, and very happy. i could tell just from the feel of the place that it was a very happy and loving home. we spent the day with them, playing football and just hanging out.

that is exactly the kind of place i would love to get steven and dennis into. you cant just put street kids into a regular kids home/orphanage. most times, there is trouble with them running away and causing trouble, just not getting along well with the other kids. street kids are a different breed. they are used to complete freedom, not having any rules, doing whatever they want. sometimes, there are drug addictions to deal with as well.

any home that is going to care for street kids has to be special. they require so much individual attention. they need to feel loved, cared for, wanted. they need to be comfortable as well with the other people there. often, counseling services are needed. i could tell that sara's home would be so great to get the kids into. so we asked her

she was enthusiastic, but needed to check with her director back in canada (i dont remember what the NGO's called). he was enthusiastic as well, but wanted to make sure that the kids wanted to study- they had a kid run away about a year ago because he didnt want to be in school, it was heart breaking for them.

so we went out and found the kids, told them about the home, and what was expected if they were gonna live there, and they were both excited. so we agreed to meet monday morning to take them down to jinja, while we waited for final confirmation from the NGO director. after scrambling around and pushing, probably harder than i should have(keep in mind this is over a period of two or three days), we got final clearance and went monday to meet them.

but they were a no show. both of them. we rode up to the meeting place and our hearts dropped. we were a little late, but not late enough to have missed them. at least, i dont think so. i dont know what happened. its still a mystery to me. they werent on the streets when we went out to look, as i said, they ususally go for football if there is a match. so i havent seen them in about a week, and i have no idea what happened.

just before i left(my bus left at midnight) we went walking around, looking for them, hoping that id at least get to say goodbye, but no good.

though im so sad about this all, i know its gonna be fine. we got the green light from the kids home, so all thats left is finding steven and dennis. as long as they still want to go, we can get them there. ronnie will continue to look for them, and my hopes are with him. i think, maybe, it just wasnt meant for me to take them to the home. i dont need to be the one that finishes it. although i would love to have been able to, ive learned so much trust and patience through this.

please continue to join me in prayer for these two kids. it would a dream come true if we got them in a home before Christmas!

as for leaving, that was no easy task. i put if off for about a month, slowly saying my goodbyes and tying up loose ends over that period. still, when the day came and i was packing up, it was with a heavy heart. i almost burst into tears when i was holding eddy for the last time, just before he went to sleep. it reminded me of when we first got him, he would just sit on our laps at night until he fell asleep. now, as then, i am reminded what a blessing he is, how God is so merciful.

when i was packing, he told me that he wanted to come too, to wait for him. he said he could fit in one of the bags, that he would climb inside, and come with. man, that broke my heart. if he only knew how much i would love him to be able to come with. im not sure when ill be coming back. but i know i will, and soon. if for no other reason than to see him again. of course, there is so much more calling me back. i think itll be sooner rather than later.

well, its all wrapping up. i cant say i would trade a moment.


all my love